Return of the Jedi (the fat duck-like one).

So I did say I'd given up this extremely indulgent practice, but for purely selfish reasons I feel compelled to recommence.  There is something wholly cathartic about airing one's laundry on the world wide web, for all and sundry to see, which in a sadistic fashion brings soothes to my soul.  And so why not.  Aside from the fact my previous dialogues managed to single handedly offend practically every person I have had the dis/pleasure of knowing or being related to, I think on the whole it was a productive venture, and something I miss dreadfully.

So this is me, beginning again, although this time writing about my friend -  ccoincidentally also named Bambi, but for legal, social, emotional and inheritance reasons, NOT actually me.

Newsworthy items.  This friend of mine with the same name, same marital situation and same socio-economic circumstances as myself has now moved back to her home town of Leicester.  And what brought this about - well let me ask you, what is the motivating factor for most changes in life?  Yes that's right - Money.  We all pretend that it doesn't govern us but honestly, in my meek opinion, it does.  You are foolish to believe otherwise.  At least in the western world anyhow. 

Alongside that, Chris (the other Bambi's husband - which is rather a shame as it would have been far more preferable were this Bambi to have a husband named say Brad or George or Eddie) has now relocated to Ireland for work purposes;  the children are all in new schools and she lives in the middle of nowhere in a building which perhaps used to be some kind of fridge freezer in a previous life.  It is practically arctic. 

What astounds, depresses and particularly frustrates Bambi number 2 is the fact that although environmental changes have occurred, emotionally she - oh sod it, I mean I am no further on than before.  I am still living with the fantasy of regaining my pre-Euan-Dan-Charlotte-Maisey figure, of being married to the man of my dreams and having a steady supply of wealth,  hence then the notable feeling of dissatisfaction with just about everything around me.  The fact of the matter is, in this drudgery called life, nothing ever really changes.  I have and will always crave a slender body, a happy marriage and an easy existence, which is pretty futile and therefore matters will continue in the same vein until I'm lucky enough to be walking beneath a ladder and a piano drops on my head, flattening my brain and sending me packing to that great big 5 star all inclusive holiday paradise in the sky.  And in a further twist of fate you can bet your backside my angel body is fat too.

No, I'm guessing this is me and I am stuck with it.  Disappointing after all the books I've read where it always comes good for the heroine (is that what I think I am??)...... and maybe that's the problem.... I exist in fantasy land, where problems are always resolved, the girl always gets the boy and they always live happily ever after.  In reality life is mostly spent just riding the wheel.

Anyway enough of my negativity.  Surely I have some positives.  Well yes of course......just need a day or so to think of them......aren't you so glad I'm back!

Doom and Gloom rule.

x x x