Handle with care.

I'm not sure whether I have told you this or not, and in perfect honesty I can't stand to re-read previous posts and find out (in the cringe department this falls second only to listening to your own voice on the answer machine) but Chris is now a Postman.  A far cry from his former roll as IT Consultant but, not surprisingly, on the whole,  a genuinely satisfying job - what man wouldn't want to hand their packages to several women each day?   Might I add that he makes a hugely handsome Postie, when compared to the Shrekish creature delivering my mail at least.  Should I be worried.....probably.  I take comfort though in the fact that were he to succomb to any attractive female it would be shortlived as he would've forgotten about it by teatime.

Yesterday however Chris had the absolute worse day in his working history; consdering this is the man who has previously worked on the bins, at a shampoo factory and as a gigolo in a male prison, this is really saying something.  Finishing the round at 7pm after a day spent in the lashing rain and freezing cold, he returned to the Delivery Office to find that everyone else had gone home - in itself not a problem except for the fact his car keys were in his locker inside.  So at half past eight he returned to our house, deflated, bedraggled and questioning his vocation in life.  On the upside he did collect a whopping two pounds in tips making his pain completely worthwhile.

This isn't however the "handle with care" I wished to discuss.  Yesterday in my spam I found an email from "Babycentre.com" - American so possibly the only explanation I need, and yes I am completely racist believing that the majority of American's are ridiculous.  My distaste however does not extend to such methods as a final solution, only a de-cheesing ritual and a plan to remove all upper intonation at the end of sentences.  The article was entitled "Your pre-schooler and you - how to survive the holidays".   Have I missed something?  Survive 9/11 yes, or the Holocaust, or earthquakes in Japan , but the 'holidays'...really?

First things first.......'Holidays?' - a new way of describing the Christmas period derived to cause zero offence to non-christian denominations.  No, no, no, no, no.  Christmas is Christmas, plain and simple.  If people find this offensive perhaps they need to question their own motivation....and the Christian in me says shoot them all.   Secondly, what is there about a 'pre-schooler' that is so utterly terrifying, detestable and fear invoking that we require a survival guide?  The last time I checked my youngest was the only child I didn't fear....an angel who patters in to my bed at 2am each morning, throwing her arms around my neck and reassuring me that I am indeed loved beyond measure.  What possibly can people have to fear from their little ones? Teenagers on the other hand....now that is a guide I would like to see.  How to navigate through the disdain they show at the fact you, their mother, is still breathing - this I need help with.

Sometimes I look at these articles and realise the world is mad - madder than mad - and I wonder when it all began.  Certainly it came about in our life time.  I can still recall when adults were in charge, when asking why' was a no go, teachers were scary, ADHD was just 'naughty' and the only time kids got to go to Disneyland Florida was when Jim fixed it for them.  The world has come so far and then turned back on itself.  

No wonder it is so hard for us all to keep a handle on things - when craziness rules.  Talking of which Chris is insisting I surrender the laptop - apparently he needs it for work related duties.  Since when has Facebook been part of Royal Mail?

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